"I'm having a problem with medication."
"You're on medication?"
"Well no, that's the problem."
I have three hundred DVD's yet today I dozed through a $4.95 VOD viewing of Secret Window. I can't explain it either.
I think I realized my worst nightmare tonight...I lived through the same hour twice.
There is an answer to every question. A right to every wrong.
I was ready to go again. Ready to disappear. But things keep happening that stop me. I can't go now because it will look like I went for the wrong reasons. So I put my hand down and return to my seat and wait again for an opportunity to catch a break.
I don't like Mondays anymore.
Tuesday is the end of so many different stories that I haven't figured out just yet how to deal with it all. There are so many exciting things happening to so many different people I know that it bothers me how excited I am for them. There is no good reason for me to feel even remotely happy, but there it is. I just like to see people do well.
At the same time though I don't understand. Here are all these people shooting for so much, and getting it in large gobs. Here I am, wanting only one thing, working my ass off to show God I deserve it...and I just can't seem to catch a break. Maybe I should have aimed higher, so that when I missed low I still hit something worth hitting.
I've grown paranoid. Grown tired. Grown old. My body's catching up to my soul, and my mind is already long gone. The journey is coming to an end. But I already know the sad truth...
There's no way out. Nowhere to go.
There is no light...we run on.
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