Missing

I can't remember what she looked like.

It wasn't that she was important, I don't even think I knew her name, but I remember her, and yesterday I remembered what she looked like. Today I don't.

The picture in my mind is still there. I remember everything, everything except her.

Maybe this doesn't sound remarkable to anyone. She wasn't anyone important, wasn't someone I knew, wasn't someone I ever gave any thought to seeing again. But like I remember practically everyone, I remembered her.

I think I thought she was pretty.

So where did she go?

I can see the blue sparks behind my eyes firing off in rapid succession waiting for some sort of connection to be made and though I get parts of pictures, I just can't get all of this one.

She was so fucking unimportant so why the fuck is it so important that I can't remember her?

It's a different sort of forgetting. I don't like it. It's not forgetting to forget the pain, it's not forgetting to move on, it's not forgetting to make room for something else. It's just forgetting in the way that things are just gone sometimes. And no...I don't like it.

Not one bit.