Burn Baby Burn

Disgusting Fact #1: My face is beat red and feels like I have a wicked sunburn.

Disgusting Fact #2: I worked 16 hours today.

I don't know man. I just don't know.
So the real inspection at the company starts tomorrow and despite my best efforts we're just not ready. I can only do so much. My father came back from Florida today, and was barely on the ground when he started to grouse about how I've been running things. He's entitled, it was his company afterall, but it's still frustrating. He says I work far too much, but in the same breathe tells me I'm not doing enough. He tells me I do too much by myself, that I need to delegate more. But in the next moment he's telling me how I can't trust anyone to do anything. He'll be back for six days. Those six days will be busy, but since he will want to split the work 50-50 and everyone else will work harder because he's back those six days will be far easier than a normal day. So if we catch a slow day here somehow we'll end up sitting around twiddling our thumbs or at the very least only work ten hours in a day. And then he'll somehow think that I'm fucking up horribly when he's not there and that's why I have to work so much. The minute he gets back on the plane everyone else goes back to jacking off, and I spend the next week trying to fix the half of the things that he did because with the not being around and all he tries to jump into the middle of things and ends up making more of a muddle of things then anything else. So the time right after he goes is the busiest for me. Which means I'll be stuck there all day and all night. Which means he'll think that the minute he left I started fucking things up again.

I can't win.

I was just reading a story about how the Monterrey Aquarium freed a Great White Shark that had set a record for surviving in captivity. I figured Great Whites are pretty tough animals and sharks can live a while, so it must have been in captivity for quite awhile. Then I found out it was only held for 198 days.

That didn't sound like a lot to me. Then I read that the previous record was sixteen days. Sixteen fucking days. It only took sixteen days for a tank to break the spirit of one of the greatest predators in the world. Sixteen days! And that was the longest it ever took...until this guy wanders along. And 198 days after they capture him, they let him out. 198 days and he beats the tank. So the toughest Great White Shark this side of Jaws finally beats the man and what do they do? They release him into the wild, where he has to fend for himself. Fight against man and mother nature for the right to fight another day. He lasted 182 days longer than the runner-up, he beat the tank, beat the man, but he's still only fifty-fifty to live out his natural life span. Sometimes you just can't win.

I feel a bit like those Great White Sharks, and whether I last sixteen days in this cage or go the fucking distance I won't kid myself, how can I when I know the truth?

I just can't win.

Well maybe I could, but I'd probably have to cheat.